late july to late august 2026

today i sat down and asked myself:

how was my august?

not just what did i achieve.

what did i experience?

what changed in me?

what did i avoid?

what did i learn?

this month didn’t sort itself into good or bad. it stayed mixed. and i think that’s the point.

some days i felt confident.

some days fearful.

some days full of self-doubt.

some days confused.

and sometimes all of them together.

i got my passport.

i cooked.

i started speaking more and sharing my perspective.

i found sisters.

i found a space that feels like home.

new friends.

more home food.

i also noticed something changing in how i listen.

i am trying to allow people’s perspectives instead of immediately trying to add my own.

this month, through conversations and context presentations, i kept seeing the same thing:

everyone carries something.

i realised i’m not the only person carrying a complicated story.

everyone has their own story, their own experience, their own value.

and maybe my job is not always to give an answer.

sometimes it is to listen.

ask a curious question.

and let the other person find their own answer.

i was not able to start my articulation training with build in public.

the visa process did not go well. 😭

i was not able to control my mind in certain things.

i overspent.

yessss.

i ate outside more than 20 times when i was trying to limit it to 10.

i missed last week’s newsletter on time.

i lent money and it cost me something i didn’t think it would.

lesson learned.

no lending money from now on.

but something else happened.

earlier, missing the newsletter would have made me panic.

this time i just thought:

okay. i’ll figure it out.

maybe that is also growth.

not becoming perfect.

just not reacting to every small failure like it is the end of the world.

i spent more time with mithila, peter, sakshi, juree, paohaolen, udaya, shilpa, nagma, maitrayee, mariyam, aamir, simrita and (missing priyanka).

different people.

different conversations.

different perspectives.

a lot of my thinking this month came through people.

especially conversations where i could take something unfinished and say:

“this is what i am thinking. what do you think?”

and then listen.

not necessarily to get an answer.

but to see what i was not seeing.

different people gave me different contexts.

different perspectives.

sometimes they challenged my assumption.

sometimes they reflected something back to me and i realised i had never looked at it that way.

i think i am starting to value this more.

good thinking doesn’t always happen alone.

one thing that kept coming back this month was control.

how much do i hold?

how much do i let go?

when i am facilitating, am i creating space for people to find their own way, or am i quietly taking the power back by giving them my answer?

my instinct is always:

“yes, and also…”

i want to open another lens.

but i am learning that sometimes even that can take away someone’s space.

so i am trying to hold back.

listen.

ask one real question.

and sit in the mess a little longer before trying to clean it up.

another thing i am trying to understand is the difference between experience and learning.

everyone has experiences.

but what did that experience teach me?

what did i actually learn from it?

i am still figuring this out.

and maybe that is okay too.

one small thing surprised me.

i missed my newsletter.

and nothing terrible happened.

i just figured it out.

i think i am slowly becoming okay with things being messy.

i read something recently:

if you put the hottest thing into the cleanest container, you don’t learn anything.

that stayed with me.

maybe i have been trying too hard to make things clear, clean and finished.

some things need to stay messy for a while.

hold back more.

when i know something, my instinct is to hand it over.

but the harder move is to stay quiet and let someone find it themselves.

listen and ask one real question.

not just listen.

name my own power and invite people to challenge it.

get into the planning before the session, not just the delivery.

read more.

reflect more.

and before i design anything, check whether the concern in my head is actually the concern of the people i am designing for.

don’t assume.

i don’t need to figure everything out before moving.

i can think.

i can reflect.

i can listen.

i can change my mind.

and then i can act.

don’t thinkkkkkk forever.

do the thing.

then learn from what happened.

there are a lot of ideas in store right now.

september, i want mindful execution.

less trying to make everything clear in my head.

more doing.

don’t make it complicated.

just ask:

what were my wins this month?

what didn’t go well?

who did i spend time with, and who mattered to me?

what surprised me?

what am i still carrying?

what did i learn about myself?

what do i want to do differently next month?

write whatever comes.

no need to make it sound good.

just be honest with yourself.

how was your august, really?

Be kind, help people, trust muruga.